31 crazy ways you've got too used to living in Dubai

What do you mean I can't get my mani and pedi at the same time?

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Blasé about seeing the world's tallest building every day?

Indifferent about the 24-hour sunshine and unexcited by skiing in the middle of the desert? Hmm. It’s possible you’ve started to take Dubai for granted.

Here are some warning signs you’ve been living in the sandpit a little too long...

1. You expect five-star service everywhere you go...

Eh waiter, where is my McFlurry?

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2. Your group of friends has started to look like UN conference photos – yay!

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3. You settle in for the long haul when you're visiting the Etisalat store...

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4. ...And confidently order food delivery to the queue

You gotta eat when you gotta eat. And that's all the time.

5. You like to think you’re fluent in many languages

“Inshallah, mon amour!” OK, maybe conversational.

hello-bonjour

6. Your list of essentials for leaving the house has doubled

Keys, credit card, phone... I.D, medical card, passport, sunglasses, factor 50, water, flat shoes, bikini, deodorant, cash. Check.

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7. You've applied tanning oil in 45 degree heat at least once

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8. You think it's totally normal to spend the morning on a man-made beach and the afternoon skiing in a mall

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9. You’re no longer impressed when you see supercars outside swanky hotels

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10. You think it’s totally normal to nip into the world's biggest mall for some milk

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11. You’ve become an expert at telling a Karama fake from the real thing

And judging people appropriately.

12. Having eight drinks in front of you at the end of a brunch is totally acceptable

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13. Your hair has struggled to adjust to the weird water, so you’ve spent a fortune on fancy conditioners

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Fly hair don't care.

14. You know you need to wear plenty of layers at the cinema

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15. You're so used to the sound of construction work that you kinda miss it when it's not there

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16. 20 degrees? Baltic! Grab your scarves and hats – winter has arrived.

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17. Road rage is so commonplace that you've started to treat it as a form of therapy

And relax.

18. Sitting in traffic. To your left a large Range Rover with mum, dad, two nannies and up to six kids. To your right, a similar car, with a man and his pet tiger

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19. Seatbelts? Unless they're being used to hold excess shopping, they’re not being used

Seriously, always wear your seatbelt.

20. You expect all stores, malls and cinemas to open until at least 1am

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21. Bi-monthly salon trips are now rituals

Because bikinis can be worn all year round.

22. Mani-pedis and brow grooming are standard. You wouldn't dream of shaping with tweezers yourself

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23. You’ve forgotten how to pump petrol

"It goes in here, right?"

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24. You get excited about rain

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25. You don’t go downstairs to the store. You let the store come to you

Even if it’s just for a can of coke.

26. You no longer use the indicators

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27. You've started to get slightly less surprised at how hot it gets every summer

And you've stopped posting screenshots on Facebook.

28. You’re genuinely surprised if anything is sorted out quickly

In fact, you've actually started to allow time for the stuff you need to get done.

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29. You've realised that speed limits have no power here

They're more guidelines anyway.

30. Admit it. You're lazy

"It's fine. The maid will clean that up."

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31. Your AC breaking down is the equivalent of a natural disaster

"I'M NOT GOING BACK IN THERE UNTIL IT'S FIXED!"

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Now read: Which area of Dubai are you best suited to?

Written By

Casey Fitzgerald

You'll find Casey teaching a class full of kids by day and eagerly restaurant hopping by night. Always excited about unique dining experiences, she never eats at the same place twice...

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