The 13 Types Of People Who Rule Dubai Gyms

Are you the one blaring Alicia Keys’s “This Girl is on Fire?!"

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Believe it or not, squats aren’t my favorite thing to do in the gym. What I do enjoy is watching my fellow gym goers… Not in a creepy, stalking kind of way (unless there is a Tom Hardy lookalike) but rather in a curiously amused kind of way.

So after clocking many hours in the gym watching people (and also working out... I swear by Jane Fonda’s life) it is time to reveal the honorary list of: People Who Rule the Gym Scene in Dubai

The flex-gurus who can’t stop checking themselves out in the mirror

Believe me your triceps are still the same size since the last time you checked


Those who conduct business meetings while taking hostage of: the abs machine, 3 dumbbells, a bench and 5 medicine balls in 3 different colors


Those who are itching to tell you “that’s not how you do the perfect burpee”

Well maybe I like to twirl after every burpee… got a problem with that?


The John Cena lookalikes who don’t want you to see them in the Zumba class

It’s okay; there are more embarrassing things, like sneaking Alicia Keys’s “This Girl is on Fire” into your gym track list.


The pick-up artists who are clearly there to chat you up

You’ll always catch them staring and smiling when you are halfway through your back squats.


The ones who make all sorts of noises, grunts and wounded animals little roars

Then you turn your head to see them lifting a 1KG dumbbell… with both hands.


The personal trainer with a beer belly

How is that for motivation?


The ones who sweat all over the machine then confidently walk away allowing you to enjoy a new skin infection

Unless your sweat is the Fountain of Youth then I don’t want to bathe in it


The ones who burn more calories by posting gym selfies than by actually doing some exercise

#WorkOut #Motivation #DubaiFitness #My5FollowersWillLoveThisSelfie


The flat-out annoying talkers whom the only lifting they do is when they lift their arms to force high-five you

What if I told you moving your tongue muscle isn’t considered sport?


The competitive ones who watch you out of the corner of their eyes

Then smirk and breathe a sigh of relieve when you reach for the 3 KGs instead of the 8 KGs


The gym divas who attack your eyes with an onslaught of clashing colors

The only thing that moves in them is their makeup… when it’s running down their faces!


Those who faint or puke after 3 minutes on the treadmill

But they will happily stand for 5 hours at the bar or circle the Dubai mall 4 times in search for the perfect shade of blood-orange-red lipstick.

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